Backward Rain

  May 3, 2004

 

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NOW

May 3, 2004 - Monday

Today we had stifling heat (92 degrees). There were mosquitoes and gnats and I stayed in all day. A bit of July in May and Iím afraid it was a forerunner of the summer to come. For someone who likes the outdoors, I should be hardier about the heat but it, combined with the bugs, was more than I felt like dealing with today. My excuse was that Iím waiting for the water tank salesman to call back so I spent most of the day at my computer or fooling with the guitar.

Iím learning the chords to some Pink Floyd and Neil Young songs and Iíve reached a point where I can almost recognize the tunes. Theyíre pretty easy but since I canít sing, I have to get extra elaborate with my playing to make them recognizable. Of course Neil Young doesnít have the greatest voice but still, Iím self-conscious about trying to croak out his tunes. Gotta admit, I feel a little silly singing, ďHey, hey. My, my. Rock and Roll will never dieĒ. I donít think anyone but Neil Young can get away with singing his tunes. Iíve also been listening to Woody Guthrieís ďDust Bowl BalladsĒ and if I can find the sheet music I might try some of his songs.

Things are pretty quiet here on the West Coast so Iíll be on my way and leave you with a photo I took on our backpacking trip last October.

 


Paradise Valley - Sequoia

 

THEN

May 23, 1968 Thursday

Iíve cut so much school in the past few weeks that Iíve actually been out of school more than in. They look the other way when it comes to seniors so no harm.

On the other hand, today was my first full day of school since last Thursday and it went pretty bad. Iíve given up studying or at least studying hard. After dinner I was in a pretty bad mood so I went driving. After going to Imperial Beach I got home around 8:00 and narrowly missed having a fight with the parents. I then went for a long walk down the beach and I think it helped my mood a little.

Lately Iíve been totally wrapped up in my own thoughts and I didnít even notice my surroundings during the walk. Iíve lost all ambition (what little I had) and I seem to have fallen into sort of a limbo concerning any thoughts of my future. I used to pride myself on my loner personality but lately Iíve spent so much time with my friends that its begun to get me down. I find that their personalities have begun to rub off on me. I canít say that I like it either because Iím not totally satisfied with them.

I find that I have become more disgusted with myself and I canít exactly understand why. I guess I havenít lived up to my expectations. I only work on Saturdays now and I have found that even with the extra time I canít complete my obligations. The trouble is, I donít know what to do with myself when I have time to myself.

A week or so ago Ron and I spent the night at the beach Ė or Ė at least a good portion of the night. We took some beer and built a fire on a desolate portion of the Strand. At 3:30 the police came and chased us away.

Last Friday Bill and I got drunk.

Looks like Bobby Kennedy is going to run for president.

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