January 29, 1968 - Monday
These last few weeks have
been pretty carefree. My mother went back east and during that time I've
been going my own way.
I'm still working quite a bit
and believe it or not, I may use some of my savings for a down payment on a
house. Doctor Smith is selling it and he has offered to make special
arrangements that would allow someone my age to buy it.
March 7, 1968
Father won't let me buy the
Through out my life I have
engaged in certain childish interests and hobbies. They included everything
from model making to Boy Scouts. In everything I did I got little or no
support from my parents. They always seemed more interested in their own
activities. If anything, they made me feel inferior. For instance, they cut
down everyone associated with my Boy Scout troop. They cut down my friends
and their families. They make everything in the world sound childish
and yet, they don't examine themselves. They have never put themselves
out for me unless it will benefit them. Otherwise it's up to me to
take care of myself.
When I told father that
Doctor Smith was making it easy for me to buy a house, all he could say was,
"That's just what I'm looking for." At the time all he and mother could talk
about was what a good investment it would make for them. The only one
who showed any pleasure about the fact that it might be a good opportunity
for me personally was Doctor Malone. He thought it was a great idea.
Whenever my parents gave me
encouragement in anyway, they did it in a manner that made me feel it was
just for show. They didn't care what I really did just as long
as they made it look like they were filling the basic requirements of
being a parent.
This was a chance of a
lifetime and they've decided to pretend to be parents and keep me from
buying the house. I'm supposed to concentrate on school! What a
laugh, they don't even know what classes I'm taking.
Now my parents wonder why I
don't communicate with them.