June 13, 1967 - Tues
Continued from last entry
Last Saturday night at about
1:30 a.m. I was driving around the Amphibious Housing and I was stopped by
the police. I like to drive around at night when I just want to get
away and think. That's not a good story to give the police because they
always think a kid my age is up to no good. I was lucky I had my
military dependent I.D. and I think that's what saved me. No ticket!
June 16, 1967 - Friday
Brother, this has been one
heck of a day. No more school anyway. I got all B's except for
Geometry and I don't want to talk about that. OK! I got a D in
Geometry. I don't know why but I just couldn't get it.
Next year I don't think I'll
take the advanced English course. Even though I got a B I just didn't
feel like I fit in with the other kids. Bet I can get an A in the regular
The worst thing happened
today at work. Out of the clear blue, Al quit. The other boy
(Ron) was in today and since he does the same junk I do there's nothing left
for me. Right now I spend more time in the back trying to look busy
but doing nothing. Since Ron has worked there longer I asked him if he
knew of anything that needed to be done. He didn't have the faintest
It's really gotten me annoyed
the way nobody tells me anything down there. They continually put me
on the spot as far as working is concerned. First I go in and another boy is
doing my job then the next thing Dr. Malone was there asking me if I could
work tomorrow. I wasn't scheduled to work but I was so in a daze that
I said yes. He was all for dropping it there but I asked him what the
heck I'd be doing over the summer and he wasn't sure.
I was mistaken to say Al quit
and I'm almost sure he didn't. I just talked to him last night and he said
nothing about quitting. I have the feeling he was fired. Nobody's told
me where he went, only that he he and his wife are gone for good.
Hell if I'm going to work
full time during the summer with nothing to do. I like the job but not
the way it's turning out.
I just went for a long walk
down the beach. I just wanted to think over my plans. Of course
I came to no conclusions on anything. I was wondering what it takes to be a
good poet or writer. When I read the works done by great writers I
wonder how a person can write such beautiful words and not loose his whole
mood by worrying about things like where the next meal is coming from or
who's going to pay the rent.
I seem to get too upset over
details in my life. I wish I could express myself well but when I try,
I start thinking about stupid problems that distract me. When ever I
try to express my feelings I always end up discouraged.
I guess you know that when
I'm depressed I'm always taking long walks. Tonight I didn't have to
worry about school and my mind was free to appreciate the surroundings.
The beach was beautiful.